grow up that doesn’t make me gay I just titty [ __ ] her titties are as real as any titties in their life it’s 2:00 in the morning I was just borrowing a little friction from a stranger who whoops it’s the madness of Youth types of mistakes a man makes when he’s young I wouldn’t even know that it’s necessarily a mistake was wild Night Out but I don’t do it like that anymore I’m old I’m 44 now thanks it’s first time in my life I’ve...[Read More]
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The second time I met OJ Simpson was right after the trial of this there I was now a young man of probably 23. O.J Simpson was the most famous or inFAMOUS face on planet Earth I was in a restaurant in Beverly Hills with my agents I wasn’t alone in the restaurant But I was alone I was the only black person in the restaurant and in the 90s that felt very uncomfortable now I tend to enjoy it at this age I was having dinner with my agents celebrating a deal that they told me was lucrative but ...[Read More]
Well it’s the last show here we are Los Angeles the world capital of rape and Dick Brown the [ __ ] has been going on out here he’s gonna work well just what you think can’t get worse they got Charlie Rose today it’s gonna be quiet morning on the news tomorrow Charlie Rose looking kangaroo Every body is raping like hotcakes I for one was starting to get worried you know I’ve been in Show Business 30 years I had no idea how much danger I was in that’s really so...[Read More]
from New York City Comedy Central presents Bill Burr all right thank you thank you very much all right nice nice to be here beautiful theater here I didn’t do anything today I’m a loser man that was still when I was sitting around I was watching that show I MTV Cribs you guys know that show you don’t show with this show all the rock stars and the rappers houses and all their stuff does that show make you feel like a loser kills my self-esteem I’m sitting there watching Br...[Read More]
It’s one time racism saved my life man I was I was on a plane I was coming I was coming from overseas and uh I don’t know how this guy got a machine gun on the plane but he stood up man he said everybody get on the [ __ ] Grown nobody look at my face I started freaking out because he was Chinese I was like why is he talking like that [Applause] he was screaming and crying I was the only brother on the plane well I thought I was young brother I looked over there was one of the black d...[Read More]
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[Music] [Music] thank you thank you new york thank you stubborn stop it how are you guys yeah i am woo too i uh i’m feeling woo i uh it’s so good to be here i’m uh the prime of my life i’m in my late 20s i’m 31 and it’s just it’s going great i uh that’s a woman’s age like i am a woman but i don’t feel like one most of the time i’m still feeling like a girl a lot of times like i’m still relating to taylor swift songs on a lev...[Read More]
We had a dude in our town this morning Thundercat yeah TJ was his name when the Thundercat while you’re behind your little wildflower and he was born some deficiencies he had a change of salivary glands in his face you know so when he would get to smile at her feeling real Joyous he would spray out the sides of his neck she had to keep a paw home you know drying up at the corners of his mouth that’s friendship unfortunately the devil got up twice cause he had hair growing directly ou...[Read More]